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Assignment: Persuasive
Paper Part 3: Possible Disadvantages, Answers, with Visuals
Using the attached paper
consisting of Parts 1 and 2 add Part 3. Plan to include visuals to illustrate
the advantages of your proposed solution.
Write an eight to ten
(8-10) page paper in which you:
Provide Part I: Revision
of A Problem Exists (3-4 pages)
1. Revise your Persuasive Paper Part 1: A Problem Exists,
using feedback from the professor and classmates.
Provide Part 2: Revision
of Part 2: Solution to Problem and Advantages (3-4 pages)
2. Revise your Persuasive Paper Part 2: Solution to Problem
and Advantages, using feedback from the professor and classmates.
PERSUASIVE PAPER PARTS 1 and 2 ATTACHED. FEEDBACK FOR PART 2 ATTACHED.
Develop Part 3: Possible
Disadvantages, Answers, with Visuals (1-2 pages, for 7-9 total pages)
3. Included a defensible, relevant thesis statement in the
first paragraph.
4. State, explain, and support the first disadvantage
(economic, social, political, environmental, social, equitable, ethical/moral,
etc.) to your solution and provide a logical answer. This should be one (1)
paragraph.
5. State, explain, and support the second (and third if
desired) disadvantage (economic, social, political, environmental, social,
equitable, ethical/moral, etc.) to your solution and provide a logical answer.
This should be one or two (1-2) paragraphs.
6. Include one or two (1-2) relevant visuals that help
illustrate an advantage.
7. Use effective transitional words, phrases, and sentences.
8. Provide a concluding paragraph to summarize the proposed
solution, its advantages, possible disadvantages, and answers to the
disadvantages. Repeat or paraphrase your thesis statement.
9. Develop a coherently structured paper with an
introduction, body, and conclusion.
10. Use one (1) or more rhetorical strategy (ethos, logos,
pathos) to explain claims.
11. Support disadvantages and answers with at least two (2)
additional quality relevant references. Use at least eight (8) total for Parts
1, 2, and 3. Note: Wikipedia and other Websites do not qualify as academic
resources.
Your assignment must
follow these formatting guidelines:
Be typed, double spaced, using Times New Roman font
(size 12), with one-inch margins on all sides; citations and references
must follow APA or school-specific format. Check with your professor for
any additional instructions.
Include a cover page containing the title of the
assignment, the student’s name, the professor’s name, the course title,
and the date. The cover page and the reference page are not included in
the required assignment page length.
Note: Submit your assignment to the designated
plagiarism program so that you can make revisions before submitting your paper
to your professor.
The specific course
learning outcomes associated with this assignment are:
Recognize the elements and correct use of a thesis
statement.
Associate the features of audience, purpose, and text
with various genres.
Analyze the rhetorical strategies of ethos, pathos,
logos in writing samples and for incorporation into essays or
presentations.
Correct grammatical and stylistic errors consistent
with Standard Written English. Prepare a research project that supports an
argument with structure and format appropriate to the genre.
Revise drafts to improve clarity, support, and
organization.
Recognize how to organize ideas with transitional
words, phrases, and sentences.
Incorporate relevant, properly documented sources to
substantiate ideas.
Use technology and information resources to research
selected issues for this course.
Write clearly and concisely about selected topics using
proper writing mechanics.
peer_review_assignemt.docxeng_paper.docx
peer_review_assignemt.docx
eng_paper.docx
Unformatted Attachment Preview
Appendix A: Peer Review Feedback Form 2
Reviewer’s Name: _Kaiser Ahmed
Date: _Nov 29,2015_
Writer’s Assigned #: _William Hartzfeld
Course:__Eng 215__
Section:__online
Assignment 4: Persuasive Paper Part 2: Solution and Advantages
Peer reviews should provide feedback to a peer on the criteria expected in the paper. Follow
these instructions:
• Receive a classmate’s paper from your professor (in class if on-ground; by e-mail if online).
• Copy the Peer Review Feedback Form from the Appendix.
• Comment on all criteria, noting strengths and / or areas for improvement on the feedback
form.
• Provide completed Peer Review Feedback Form and classmate’s paper to your professor.
Note: On-ground students should submit the feedback form and paper to the professor during
the class meeting in which the paper is reviewed; online students should submit the feedback
form and paper to the professor via the Assignment Tab in the course shell.
Criteria
+ Strengths
Comments < Areas for
Improvement
1. Revise, using feedback from the
professor and classmates, your
Persuasive Paper Part I - A
Problem Exists.
His introduction clearly states
that a problem exists and lists
those problems out.
NA
The motivating factor for using
motorbikes in almost every
aspect of life is mainly their low
prices making them affordable
to many, as well as their ability
to reach remote areas with
ease.
I think maybe add stronger
verbiage.
Viable solution not listed
Needs to add solution.
Part 1
Part 2
2. Included a defensible, relevant
thesis statement clearly in the first
paragraph.
3. Explain a detailed, viable solution
that supports your thesis. This
should be one or two (1-2)
paragraphs.
4. State, explain, and support the
first advantage (economic, social,
political, environmental, social,
equitable, ethical/moral, etc.) to
your solution. This should be one
or two (1-2) paragraphs.
Listed that “The medications of
the victims consume a lot of
family money. Sometimes, it
may require the family of the
affected person to borrow
money from credit institutions
and friends to pay the huge
hospital bills”
Still needs work on supporting
first advantage still listing the
problem and elaborating on it.
5. State, explain, and support the
second advantage (economic,
social, political, environmental,
social, equitable, ethical/moral, etc.)
to your solution. This should be
one or two (1-2) paragraphs.
Many people have died in the
accidents, leaving behind
orphans in the care of the
society. The orphaned children
that fail to land on safe hands
mostly become street children
and live a terrible life after that.
Others lack good moral
guidance from their guardians,
and they become a nuisance to
the society too. In addition to
that, the survivors of the
accidents may remain crippled
in the rest of their lives
6. State, explain, and support the
Some motorists lack safety
third (and fourth if desired)
jackets while cycling, which
advantage (economic, social,
make them exposed to the
political, environment, social,
equitable, ethical/moral, etc.) to your wind and cold that may lead to
solution. This should be one or two
illnesses such as pneumonia
(1-2) paragraphs.
and frostbite in the end. The
exposure to the harsh
conditions is heightened by the
high speed at which the
motorbikes move, which
increases the penetration of
the cold air in the lungs of the
cyclists.
7. Use effective transitional words,
Uses strong verbiage to explain
phrases, and sentences.
problem
8. Provide a concluding paragraph
NA
/transitional paragraph that
summarizes the proposed solution
and its advantages.
9. Develop a coherently structured
paper with an introduction, body,
and conclusion.
10. Use one or more rhetorical
strategies (ethos, logos, pathos) to
explain advantages.
11. Support advantage claims with
at least three (3) a d d i t i o n a l
quality relevant references. Use at
least six (6) total for Parts 1 & 2.
12. Other
He lists the problem again but
did not elaborate on a solution.
Again lists the problem and
doesn’t elaborate on a solution
NA
Did not list solution in
conclusion
Strong
NA
NA
NA
Weak
NA
Running Head: CYCLING ACCIDENTS PREVENTION
1
Cycling related accidents problems
Introduction
In the current world, motorbikes and bicycles are common means of transport. Many people use
motorbikes and bicycles as a means of transport as well as during their leisure activities. The
motivating factor for using motorbikes in almost every aspect of life is mainly their low prices
making them affordable to many, as well as their ability to reach remote areas with ease. Cycling
is also fun, and many people opt cycling to work, school, and during their leisure activities.
Although cycling is associated with so many benefits, it is also associated with many accidents
that sometimes could be fatal. For this reason, there is a need to adhere to cycling safety rules;
otherwise, we are going to witness more and more people die with others getting severe injuries
on our roads due to cycling-related accidents.
History and status of cycling related accidents
Cycling related accidents have been increasing since the late 1990s. This is associated with the
increased number of cyclists in the world today. The accidents have left very many people
crippled, severely injured and others dead (Brandt, et al., 2002). It is also important to note that,
not all cycling related accidents are recorded; the ones that do not seem to have minor effects on
the people involved are never recorded. This gap may discourage the observance of road safety
procedures in the case of motorists. The major reason for the high number of deaths in the
accidents is the negligence of the cyclists to wear protective gear. Lack of protective gear such as
helmets makes them get severe injuries in the case of accidents occurring. The helmet is
supposed to be preventing the head from injuries if an accident occurs. This is mainly because
the cyclists drive exposed unlike the case of vehicles, in which the occupants are inside the
CYCLING ACCIDENTS PREVENTION
2
vessel and may be protected by use of air bags and safety belts. This reduces the fatality of
vehicle accidents in comparison to the bike accidents.
In the US, more than 14200 motorbike-related accidents were recorded between the year 2008
and 2010 (Smet, 2013). Most of the cyclists involved in the accidents were reported to have
lacked safety gear while cycling. This probably was the main cause of the accidents. Observing
protective measures is likely to reduce the occurrence of cycling related accidents largely as well
as reduce the extent of their severity in the case of their occurrence. Cyclists should not overlook
wearing light fluorescent clothing during the day and reflectors at night. These play a very
important role in the road safety. They make them easily identifiable by the other road users and
thus, prevent the cases of being hit by other bikes. The case of helmets reduces the level of
injuries experienced on the head in the case of accidents occurring. They also need to wear heavy
jackets. This reduces their exposure to the wind and cold while driving that could lead to
illnesses related to breathing such as pneumonia as well as breathing difficulties.
Problems related to failure to use safety measures
Firstly, we have economic problems linked to the accidents concerning failure to observe safety
measures. The medications of the victims consume a lot of family money. Sometimes, it may
require the family of the affected person to borrow money from credit institutions and friends to
pay the huge hospital bills. The medical expenses may heighten in the case of internal head
injuries that are due to failure to wear helmets while cycling. In such an event, the cost of
carrying out the medical operation procedures on the victim is so high that it may be shifted from
individual to society and then to the government (Ichikawa, Chadbunchachai, and Marui, 2003).
This indicates that a lot of money that could be used in development projects is consumed by the
medication procedures. If safety measures were observed, a lot of money would be saved for,
CYCLING ACCIDENTS PREVENTION
3
and our economy would be less strained by the recurrent expenditure that we can all unite to
eliminate.
Secondly, many lives have been lost due to the accidents. We keep on losing our loved ones in
these accidents, bread whiners, and even great minds and kids. Many people have died in the
accidents, leaving behind orphans in the care of the society. The orphaned children that fail to
land on safe hands mostly become street children and live a terrible life after that. Others lack
good moral guidance from their guardians, and they become a nuisance to the society too. In
addition to that, the survivors of the accidents may remain crippled in the rest of their lives. This
attracts a lot of attention from family members, as they need to be helped in their new and
special condition. For that reason, a lot of productive time is utilized in taking care of these
victims.
Additionally, we also have health problems associated with the failure to observe safety
measures. Some motorists lack safety jackets while cycling, which make them exposed to the
wind and cold that may lead to illnesses such as pneumonia and frostbite in the end. The
exposure to the harsh conditions is heightened by the high speed at which the motorbikes move,
which increases the penetration of the cold air in the lungs of the cyclists. The cyclist may also
experience breathing difficulties in the case of such conditions occurring. Where the sicknesses
are not detected early enough, they may overcome the patient and s/he eventually dies. The other
health issue is in the case of occurrence of an accident. The victim may suffer mental injuries
that make them totally incapacitated. They may lose their coordination ability for the rest of their
lives.
CYCLING ACCIDENTS PREVENTION
4
Conclusion
In conclusion, we need to come together and address the issue of cycling related accidents as one
people. From the above discussion, it is evident that the effects of these accidents are not
desirable at all. They have economic, social as well as health problems on the people involved.
The big issue is that most of the causes of these accidents are controllable by the simple
observance of safety measures. Why should we keep on having these cycling accident related
problems while we have all it takes to control them? Let us all embrace the cycling safety
measures for our good, the good of our families and the society.
CYCLING ACCIDENTS PREVENTION
5
Solution and advantages
Introduction
I hope by now you agree with me that cycling related accidents are not desirable at all due to the
many problems associated with them. There is the need to come up with ways of controlling this
kind of accidents from occurring. We should come up with the society today and endeavor to
control these occurrences. Although it is not possible to eliminate accidents on our roads, it is
good that we put in place safety measures that seek to reduce the occurrences of such accidents,
letting only the inevitable accidents to occur. It is also important that we control the effects of the
accidents by use of protective gears such as helmets.
The most effective way of controlling these accidents is by the application of the law. Law
enforcement on the matter can see these accidents reduce largely. The traffic police department
can help a lot in the reduction of these cases. Huge fines should be imposed on cyclists who do
not wear protective gear. This will act as a scaring factor in discouraging the accidents
occurrence. Organizing awareness programs are also very important. This is because many
people may suffer the mistakes for their lack of knowledge on the reasons for using the safety
gear. Besides, the cycling classes’ syllabus should incorporate the importance of observing safety
measures as well as the problems faced due to the occurrence of the accidents. This will reduce
the negligence of the cyclists when it comes to observance of safety measures.
Quality is also key in the selection of safety gear. In the current world, a lot of counterfeits are in
the market. It is not easy to know the good quality when it comes to the selection of helmets to
use. For that reason, there is a need for the government to chip in and ensure that products, which
enter the market, meet the required standards. A helmet that can break very easily is not desirable
CYCLING ACCIDENTS PREVENTION
6
at all. This kind of counterfeits usually attracts many customers due to their low prices in the
market. Cyclists need to be very keen with their selection of protective gear since it is for their
good. Nevertheless, the government should consider constructing other roads to be used by
cyclists. This is likely to reduce the occurrence of accidents that involve motorists and cyclists.
Advantages
One of the advantages of using the above mentioned a prevention measure is that they are cheap
to employ. Incorporating safety measures and effects of accidents in the cyclist qualification
programs requires only an amendment of the syllabus. This is important in insulating the
individual, family, society as well as the government from the economic problems associated
with the occurrence of the accidents. In the case where these methods are applied, the money that
was to be used in the treatment of the patients as well as repairing the bikes is used otherwise in
production. The above methods also raise government revenue. The money earned from cyclist
fines can be used in the sponsoring development projects as well as fueling poverty eradication
programs.
In addition to that, there is also a social advantage associated with the method above. Through
the awareness programs, members of the public learn to be their brother’s keeper. The awareness
meetings instill a social responsibility towards each other in the society. The community gets to
know the right cycling gear and employ it for their safety during cycling. These programs also
create opportunities for community members to correct and remind one another that road safety
is a social responsibility. In the end, when the prevention measures are observed accordingly,
accident occurrences are reduced and thus, the number of orphans due to the accidents is reduced
too.
CYCLING ACCIDENTS PREVENTION
7
Moreover, there is a political advantage of preventing the accidents from occurring. Most of the
cyclists are in the actively productive age bracket responsible for the economic activities. Due to
the reduction of the accidental deaths of these cyclists by the application of the above methods,
the country’s economy is likely to thrive. Because of their youthful and innovative brains, the
youths also possess leadership qualities that are important in the political development of the
country.
Additionally, we have environmental advantage associated with the prevention too. The
occurrence of the accidents leaves glasses lying on the ground; and in some extreme cases, fire
outbreaks accompany the accidents. The fire outbreaks may end up burning forests if the road
runs through a forested area. The oil pouring from the bikes may mix with runoff water and find
its way into rivers and other water bodies. These cause pollution on the water. The method of
prevention described above does not encourage pollution in any way. On prevention of the
accident occurrence, these cases are highly reduced, and the undesired pollution that could be
experienced due to the fires is prevented.
Conclusion
In conclusion, there is the need to employ the above-mentioned safety procedures concerning
cyclists’ road safety. The bad effects of the cyclists’ road accidents affect everyone in the
society. We need to come out and embrace the safety measures while cycling on the roads. It is
for our safety as well as the fueling of our economic and social development.
CYCLING ACCIDENTS PREVENTION
8
References
Brandt, M. M., Ahrns, K. S., Corpron, C. A., Franklin, G. A., & Wahl, W. L. (2002).
Hospital cost is reduced by motorcycle helmet use. Journal of Trauma and Acute Care
Surgery, 53(3), 469-471.
Colorado, 1989–1990. Accident Analysis & Prevention, 27(3), 363-369.
Cushman, R., Down, J., MacMillan, N., &Waclawik, H. (1991). Helmet promotion in the
emergency room following a bicycle injury: a randomized trial.Pediatrics, 88(1), 43-47.
Ichikawa, M., Chadbunchachai, W., & Marui, E. (2003).Effect of the helmet act for motorcyclists
in Thailand.Accident Analysis & Prevention, 35(2), 183-189.
Larsen, J., & El-Geneidy, A. (2011).A travel behavior analysis of urban cycling facilities in
Montréal, Canada. Transportation research part D: transport and environment, 16(2), 172-177.
Lott, D. F., & Lott, D. Y. (1976).Effect of bike lanes on ten classes of bicycle-automobile
accidents in Davis, California. Journal of Safety Research.
Smet, A. (2013). Transportation accident analysis and prevention. New York: Nova Science
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