Expert answer:Need communications help to check my essay. Correc

Answer & Explanation:final pro.docxAttach my file. Read it carefully. Rewrite TWO paragraph of my essay. Correct my grammar error and develop the structure of my essay. This is my final project, it need to be perfect. I am not American, I want my essay can be write like native students.
final_pro.docx

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Su Xinyue/ Sue
Studying abroad is becoming more and more popular, and
the tuition requires a large amount of money for a family.
Tien-yow Jeme is the first Chinese railroad engineer in
history and be called the father of Chinese railroad. {Put the
hyperlink behind his name only.} He was sent to the United
States by Qing imperial officials as a part of the Chinese
Educational Mission in 1872. After graduating from high
school there, he was admitted to Yale University and
majored in civil engineering. He got support from the
government; thus, he didn’t need to worry about tuition.
The number of students studying abroad was few in Leme’s
time. But nearly half of the typical extended families have at
least one child studying abroad in modern China, according
to a survey by National Bureau of Statistics of the People’s
Republic of China. At the same time, tuition is the biggest
problem for the families who support children studying
abroad; Thus, financial scholarships have become a target
for international students.
(This two paragraph need to be change into another
example, the example must can fit in my essay!)
Actually, going abroad is not my purpose,” said Yuqing
Zheng, a freshman communication major from Chengdu,
China, at Troy University. “I never think about going abroad
because I think the tuition is too expensive, and the living fee
is also higher a lot than China. “My parents think having an
overseas educational background will be more competitive
when seeking a job in China after I get back.”
Shuming Xiao is Jun Hu ‘s mother. She is living in Shanghai,
China. Her son used to study in America.
“I’m really proud of my son,” she said. “In his university life,
through his own efforts he saved a lot of money for me.
Besides the first semester, I only pay half of the tuition
because he has a scholarship. At first semester, I have to pay
whole tuition. It was a lot of money for our family. I am
afraid that I can’t offer him for four years. However, my son
is excellent.
“At present, he is an executive of a securities company in
Shanghai, China. His high income is worth the huge cost in
the past, just like investing.”
On the other hand, scholarship also proved students’ ability.
The international students’ scholarships are important, as
they support students who come from poor backgrounds to
acquire education on reduced or fully sponsored program,”
said, the director of international office at Troy University.
“The students benefit from the available chances and study
abroad. The program motivates the students to get a firm
education background and excellent achievements to
continue working harder.
“It also helps an individual to participate in youth affairs, as
some of the organizations offering these scholarships expose
their students into constructive agendas even as they
continue with their studies. As such, one has a good
exposure to real-life situations and links the theoretical
knowledge with the practical skills learned in the field. “
Applying for scholarships is not easy. Students must meet
the conditions.
Silvia Li, the coordinator of special international initiatives
at Troy University.
“I know the scholarship is very important for you,” Li said.
“The application of this scholarship is not an easy thing. Some
students are exchange students. Thus, they need to transfer some
credit from previous universities to Troy University. However,
if they want to apply for scholarships, their GPA must higher
than 3.0. It means they need to have a great grade at Troy
University and also previous universities. Besides, they have to
finish 30 credits at Troy University.
“Anyway, having scholarship is not an easy thing. They have to
earn it.”
Some international students pay more attention to part-time jobs
because they think those jobs can give them extra money.
“I work at Golden Crane restaurant during Monday, Wednesday,
Friday and Sunday,” said Jiangfu Li, a senior accounting
major from Nanjiang, China. “My GPA is not high enough to
get a scholarship. You can see I spend a lot of time on
working. However, I think it is great. I can practice my
English when I am working, and I can earn a lot of money.
Besides, I hardly go out of town, even to Montgomery,
because I don’t have time. Thus, I can save a lot of money. It
is a good thing for me. “
On the contrary, there are still some people who don’t favor
part-time jobs to earn money. Cheng Li is one of them.
Li graduated from Auburn University with a master’s degree
last December. At present, he has a part-time job in a restaurant
in Houston while delivering his resume and taking interviews
everywhere.
“I think I was wrong,” Li said, upset. “I almost do part-time
jobs for three years. Three years, I never got a scholarship.
My GPA is lower than 3.0. I pay more attention on part-time
jobs because I think it is a good way to practice my English,
and also can earn money.
“However, I was wrong. Wages for three years are lower
than the scholarship of one semester. Until I graduated, I
finally figure out, but it is too late. If I spent more time on
studying, I can find a good job easily, but not as a waiter.
Scholarship proved my ability.”

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